For many, January brings the celebration of a new year. This January, Ashley Watts will celebrate her independence.
Nearly two years ago, Ashley began living out in the community on her own, after a period that started with a court committal and included living at an Iowa DHS-run Mental Health Institute.
After continual improvement, Ashley began services with Optimae. However, the transition was not without its challenges.
“When I came to Optimae, I was very short-tempered. I could lose my cool very fast,” she said. “The way I would react to things were not the best. I would sometimes just kinda do whatever I wanted, even though I wasn’t supposed to. … I got very irritated with people, and would realize, eventually, when I looked back on it, ‘That was kind of ridiculous to get mad about.’”
When staff came in the next day to Ashley’s site home, they would talk over her reactions, and discuss what she could have done better — actions and consequences. And while they would offer correction, they would also offer encouragement.
“Every time I did something good, something really well — like working on goals, making new recipes or cleaning my room — they were very supportive for everything that I did proper, and that helps.”
Another thing that helped was Ashley’s involvement in supported employment. She started a job development program at another local agency where she did janitorial work at day hab and group homes. Eventually, she moved to linen collection at a local hospital. After measured success, she was encouraged to find a job out in the community.
“I have learned that it can be stressful, but at the end of the day, you go home, it’s over, and then the next day, you come in, it’s a brand new day with different situations,” Ashley said. “It may not be as bad, but the next day, you can prepare before it gets that bad.”
Part of Ashley’s preparation is being able to better identify her own triggers.
“If I see my day is going to be busy, I tell my boss,” she said. “I ask my boss if it’s OK to stand by the door. I can take orders out if it gets really busy with more and more coming.”
These lessons have come through perseverance, and sometimes, fits and starts. But overall, as Ashley looks back over her journey, she sees a progression that had Optimae staff at the center.
According to Ashley, staff would remind her of how far she had come. They would bring up points of what she wanted, then give her options and help her see the options that were coming.
Eventually, Ashley felt she was ready to have her own home and “do her own thing.” But, she still felt hesitant. For instance, taking the bus for transportation was a “big step.” Originally, Ashley wouldn’t do it because she was too nervous — but with encouragement, she gave it a try.
“The one time I finally got on that bus, I loved it,” Ashley said. “I would take the bus every day I had off.”
Ashley said her journey finally came to the point where she didn’t need the same level of staff support and finally got the court order dropped and got approval to live independently. Staff thought she was ready; her mom thought she was ready. Ashley herself knew she was ready, and she made her plan.
Now, nearly two years later, Ashley is seen by Optimae staff for a few hours a week (versus five days a week initially). They help her pick up groceries, or sit and talk with her by the river. She knows that she’s met her goals, and believes others can do the same, with the proper support and personal drive.
“It’s like teaching yourself different things. Take time; don’t rush it,” Ashley said. “Always go by how you feel. Start out by being out in public in small quantities. Take little steps.”
